Send Me a Boat

It's 7:30am and I haven't gone to bed yet - again.

The carpet cleaners came and went - The stains won't come out. That money to pay them was a lot of food, or part of a hydro bill, or part of the mortgage...

The male tenant is still mad at me for not taking in his brother.

At work, the brother would not cooperate with me which resulted in the entire staff team being held up. I said nothing. I did not complain. I knew that his behaviour would be seen by everyone, so I didn't need to whine. I just waited.

When the manager spoke to him about it several times, he finally started to sort of do what he was supposed to, but was doing things like throwing pieces of chicken at me instead of giving them to me. People noticed. I stayed quiet. If he wanted to be a jerk, he could do it all by himself.

Later, he decided to be civilized toward me. Then the manager asked if I would give him a ride home. I said no. No one understood.

A woman who was interested in renting a room here wrote to me to tell me she didn't get the student grant she needed (She was a really nice one, too.)

The boss at the night job went on vacation and forgot to submit my paperwork, meaning there will likely be another couple of weeks delay before I can start my new position.

All I do is work, it seems.

Very very tired.

Can't seem to manage this issue of finding time and the fatigue.

Love my dogs.

My company has been asked to support a book launch re a book about sexual abuse. I think I'm going to do it.

The days and weeks and months go by so quickly. I feel like my life is disappearing before my eyes. Feeling somewhat powerless.

But not giving up.

Tummy's been acting up again.

The broken-back feeling came back again tonight. It was harder to get rid of for some reason.

I miss church. I miss my friends. I miss having a life.

Feeling overwhelmed.

God, please show me how to swim or send me a boat.