Workin' On It

So the female tenant moved out today.

Left her garbage here. I can't afford to have it removed, but it must be done.

The beautiful two-thousand dollar carpet in her room is a mess. After she broke my vacuum, she never vacuumed her room again. That's a year and a half of NEVER vacuuming a white carpet.

There are gouges in the walls - not huge, but big enough that the walls have to be repaired and re-painted.

There's a pile of black stuff all over the driveway that I will have to clean.

I'm very disappointed. I thought she was better than that.

I seriously want to be able to make enough money that I can pay the bills myself instead of relying on rental income. Then I can take in who I want here. If I want to take someone in and not charge them rent, then I can; If I want to be extremely picky about who lives here, I can be.

I use to tell people that there weren't many rules here except for common sense type things like not tampering with safety equipment and general respect and cleanliness. I didn't realize that picking up garbage and not misusing things wasn't "common sense".

I didn't need them to be grateful. I just wanted them to treat what was given to them with respect and not continually demand more and more.

I wonder if God feels that way sometimes about us.

Physically I'm not feeling so great today. I want to call in sick, but I know that I'm not really sick enough to avoid work. The real reason is that I don't want to go in and deal with that manager tonight and I do want to work on getting my house cleaned up.

I'm trying to work on my attitude here, but I'm finding it tough. I'm tired.

I'm still thinking about the stalker and that other guy who STILL won't leave me alone. Argh.

I'm going to try to just live in the moment and work on things that way - get through it moment by moment and try not to miss the good stuff.