Sense of Entitlement

The level of some people's sense of entitlement bugs me sometimes. Does anyone not take responsibility for themselves anymore? For some people it's as if it's everyone else's job to make them happy. If you don't comply? Well, then there's the guilt trip thing.

Example: My tenants didn't bother to tell me there was a leak in the bathroom - for a YEAR! By the time I found out about it (not because they bothered to tell me, either), the damage was so bad that the walls and the floor had to be ripped out. So what should have cost me $5 and 20 minutes turned into a huge production, five THOUSAND dollars and several days of having workmen in my home.

Anyway, I told the tenants (who live in my home) that they would obviously not be able to use the shower for a few days until the workmen were done, but they could use the sink and the toilet. I told them they were welcome to come upstairs to my place and use my shower, provided they gave me some sort of notice.

Tonight the one tenant told me she wanted to be able to use the downstairs shower in the morning. I told her no, that the contractor had made it clear to me that the silicone and seals had to set properly before it could be used.

She said, "Well the guy who was here today told me I could use the shower in the morning."

I said, "He shouldn't have told you that. He's not the boss and the boss made it clear that the shower couldn't be used until tomorrow night."

She stared at me, obviously annoyed.

I said, "If you want to use my shower, you are welcome to come up."

She stared at me. "But he said I could use it in the morning."

Now I was beginning to get annoyed. After work I'd spent the evening putting varathane on the new trim in her bathroom instead of taking a much needed break.

I said, "Look, the expert tells me tomorrow night. If the seals aren't allowed to cure properly we're going to end up going through this whole production again and I'm just not doing it."

Her: Long forlorn sigh. Then she said, "Well, I'll just have to call them and tell them I can't come for my job interview tomorrow."

Me: "You are welcome to come up tonight and shower upstairs. In the morning I have to leave really early to drive to Toronto. You usually take your shower at night anyway, so you'll be all set."

(Note: I happen to know it's her usual habit to take her showers at night and not the morning)

Her - tersely: "Well if I have someplace to go I shower in the morning."

Another long sigh and a dirty look from her. (I hate that passive-aggressive crap)

Now I'm annoyed. I said, "Well, that's your choice." and I walked away.

So it was okay to let the walls and floor rot and cave in, but not okay if she has to take a shower tonight instead of the morning.

This is the same girl who borrowed my vacuum and broke it and never had it fixed - and so now does not vacuum. But she could go out and buy a brand new DVD player, go out to the bar on the weekends and spend a ton of money renting movies. Yet somehow the vacuum issue is not an issue - it's my problem. This is the same person who fills up the fridge that everyone is supposed to SHARE but no one else can use it because she's crammed it full.

Tonight I noticed that there is a big depression in the kitchen floor - where she stands cooking for hours on end. I don't begrudge her the cooking. She's overweight and the weight of her standing on the same place on the floor has caused the damage. I cannot blame her for this either, but I still have to pay for it and ripping up a kitchen floor will not be cheap or easy.

I know it's wrong, but I have to admit that these facts made it harder for me to be patient with the long sighs and her letting me know that she'd just have to rearrange her day because she couldn't shower at the time she wanted.