That Entitlement Thing

Did the definition of the right thing change while I was sleeping somewhere? Is responsibility a thing of the past? Am I by myself in the way I think?

I figured out that, to pay for the damage done to my home, I will have to work for approximately 500 weeks.

umm.. I think that's a good chunk of time there. I think that by the time I get this paid for it will be time to pay for new repairs.

Anyway, the same woman (who really is a nice person, really she is) asked me why I didn't simply ask one of my lawyer friends for the money (a lot of people think that lawyer means rich and that is not so). I didn't answer her at first because I had to actually process that question. The concept of going to a friend and asking for thousands of dollars is beyond where my brain goes.

Finally, I gave my thoughtful and exceptionally articulate response which was, "Huh?"

She said it again. I told her that besides the fact that I wouldn't dream of doing that, even if I could bring myself to do such a thing I can't in this circumstance anyway. If I can't pay a credit card company, what on earth would make me think I could repay a friend? No. That's not an option.

It turns out she wasn't suggesting that I ask for a loan; She was suggesting that I ask for a gift. That boggles my mind. To her, that was a perfectly normal, reasonable and real option.

I've seen people who complain so that people will give them things that they're afraid to ask for. That, too, is foreign to me. Oh, it's not like I don't complain - You KNOW I do! But the reason for complaining, the motive, is very different.

So this woman, and others, think that if you want something that somebody should just give it to you.

So did I just step off the mother ship or what? Not only do I not "get" it, I don't like it. So why did that annoy me so much? Maybe because I'm one of the ones who often pays for the irresponsibility of others. I'll have to think about that so that I can discover why it bugs me instead of simply blindly judging her and others like her.

Oh, and my answer to her: My friends do not owe me. My friends are not responsible for me; I'm responsible for me. That's why I'm not going to be asking anyone for thousands of dollars worked for and earned by someone else.

I had a similar conversation with my brother many years ago. It was frustrating because he thought I was being stupid when I told him that just because someone has something and you don't, does NOT somehow make you entitled to it!

I'll work the 500 weeks and have no problem holding my head up, thank you very much.

Okay... there's my mini-rant. Thanks for listening and comments are welcome.